Yesterday, my daughter got her haircut! It is her first haircut, ever, and she is fast approaching her teen years. We got through it with no tears, and I am so happy to finally be done with the struggle.
I expected she would be able to comb her hair out every day. I may be expecting too much of a child in middle school, but that was my expectation. And apparently I was wrong. Because it got tangled. Badly tangled. And I combed it out, with a stern warning to do better. Nothing happened. We repeated the cycle,
So I threatened to have it cut. She cried. I combed her hair out, and warned her sternly. We repeated the cycle.
I gave her a deadline. My husband combed her hair. Nothing happened. Her hair returned to the Horrible Tangle.
Then yesterday, she said she was ready. She wanted it cut. Before Easter. That very day.
So we did it! I took her right away, to one of the cheap places that do not require a reservation. The hairdresser charged double, because she had to comb most of the tangle out (or she'd have to cut the tangle out at the scalp -- a little too short for a first haircut!). And my daughter is thrilled with her new look. The hairdresser spend time talking over what hair care needs to look like (including combing her hair twice a day, to prevent a return of the terrible tangle.)
So, why am I writing about this here? (Other than my glee that there were no tears of regret yesterday.) It was hard making the change, and getting rid of the long hair she has had all her life. But the long hair was no longer serving her. It had a lot of memories, and a lot of her identity had always been wrapped up in being "the girl with all the hair." But it was just bring her down -- it was bring us all down, as a source of conflict. And now we're free!
The Traumatic Hair Event is a metaphor for the sentimental clutter that is clogging homes and lives. It's hard to deal with, it's hard to get rid of, but it's so freeing when it's gone!
I hope this will be inspirational to my family, and to others, to get rid of the emotional clutter that is weighing us down!