Decluttering is about more than Stuff

Today was spent texturing the walls in the bathroom. Again. Thankfully that part of the task is done. Now all we have to do is paint, panel the remaining wall, put up shelves, and clean up after ourselves. There's a reason we've put this off for so long.

While I was working, my husband took out daughter to camp, and I was alone. I listened to a few Ted Talks while I was working, and they kept playing a new talks after each talk finished, so I didn't have to push any buttons with my grimy hands. It was interesting, seeing where the internet took me on its own, but there were a couple talks that have kept me thinking all day.

Sarah Knight spoke about "The Magic of Not Giving a F***." It sounds really fabulous -- instead of decluttering every thing that doesn't benefit you, you give up activities and obligations that are not beneficial. Give up baby showers and going-away parties for people you don't like. But the more I thought about it, the more difficult it is for my to identify the things that aren't important to me.

I hate showers (bridal or baby. I like the water kind.). I really hate showers. I was glad on one occasion to spend the day with my sister, in the hospital, because it got me out of a shower. But I love my family, and if I have a niece who is being honored with a shower I'm not going to just decline to go because I hate showers. (I hated all of my showers. If I went through that time of life again I would refuse to have them.) But I love my nieces, and my family, enough that I am not going to make this about me. I will go to the shower, and I will play inane games, and I will be happy that my family is celebrating their lives. So how do I identify what activities are not in the "budget" for my time, money and effort?

I'm not certain. I will be writing out a list of all my obligations, and the obligations that my family members oblige me to commit to. Driving underage people to classes is on that list. But I will be trying to cut back on the commitments I have made so I can better use the time, money and effort I have.