Tuesday, August 1, 2017

Why do I not do the things I know I should do?

I had to run to the grocery yesterday, Again. This is the third time since Thursday (I had to shift my shopping day for my husband's birthday.) I had worked out a system, and it was working well. I made a menu, then made my grocery list from my menu and I didn't spend multiple days grocery shopping.

Why did I stop? What made me decide that coming up with a menu was harder than running back to the store over and over?

I know this isn't unique behavior. I haven't found a place to put the hand-me-down clothes I'm going to offer a family at church. So they sit on the bar -- my Flat Space of Clutter -- until next Sunday. Unless I forget, because I've gotten used to seeing clutter in the kitchen.

I have shopping bags lying around -- those are my husband's fault. No, really. I bought things for him at Home Depot, and he didn't do something with them. Like leave them on the workbench in the garage on the way in the house. Oh, wait, that was me again.

The house has been slowly getting cluttery again, with boxes for ebay and bags from the (multiple trips to the) store. Things that need to go to my mom. Clothes the kids need to decide upon.

I know what I need to do, but what keeps me from doing it? It's getting really bad; the house is feeling uncomfortable to me, but I have been successfully escaping the house to do fun things, so I don't dwell on the clutter. Do I need to reduce the amount of fun in order to focus on the house? That's not the sort of balance I'm looking for. But I do need to figure out what has lead me away from the order that we all prefer, and in so little time!

I know I can do this. I know I can maintain a peaceful, ordered home and spend time going out to the aquarium, the movies, the river walk, the beach. I need a shift in focus or order, and I need to follow the routines I have created for myself. I need to follow the routines even if they are hard because my life is better off if I do so.

Like I tell my kids, you don't have to want to, but you have to.


  1. Good news - You have been having fun and making memories with your family. Bad news - you have reverted to your old habit. To me it sounds like you aren't completing tasks but instead "dropping them off" to do later. The clothes to take to church could have been bagged up and put in the car where you will see it or a in a closet with a note by your purse to grab it on Sunday. The Home Depot shopping could have been put away perhaps and the bags recycled? Tough to break old habits. The menu planning and grocery shopping thing is a pain for many of us. I tend to not run to the store but instead substitute something else but of course that doesn't work if you run out of milk or something else essential.

  2. I'm totally reverting to old habits! I've read that you own a new habit after you've been practicing in for 30 days (or something like that), but my old habits seem sturdier than that!

    Sadly, school is almost back, but I think I'll be better able to get back on schedule when the family is on schedule.